Tips for bringing the spark back in your Marriage/Relationships.
Remember that time when the thought of your spouse would just be making your stomach turn pleasantly on its own. That time when the zeal to please and serve your spouse was your motivation? But now, maybe familiarity has set in and you have become too comfortable with them that you are not putting in effort again, don’t let your relationship die in your own hands please.
You see one killer of relationships is routine. If some of us focus on making our marriages work the way we focus on pleasing people that do not care, I tell you we would have more happy marriages.
Sometimes that spouse of yours that you have concluded is unbearable is just crying for a little of your time and attention. Don’t let your husband/wife become just your roommate. Marriage is also like plants, the grass is always greener on the part that receives attention and nutrition. Are you giving your relationship the necessary tools to keep it growing?
Let’s look at some ways you can bring back the spark back into your relationship:
1. Create bonding time and keep those phones aside. If you have to shut off all electronics, do that. As beneficial as social media is, most of us are beginning to get to attached to it that we neglect our spouses. Talk to your spouse, truly look into their eyes and listen to them. Keep all distraction away and genuinely try to know what’s happening to them.
2. Pursue your spouse again. Study them, try to notice the way they have changed. The man or woman you married years ago, might have evolved. Their dreams and aspirations might have changed and you would be there assuming you still know them. Go back to the first time and start dating them again, everyday should be an opportunity to know something new about them. Some of us are so busy that we don’t even notice that our spouse is sick; until they collapse before us. May that not be our portion.
3. Decide daily to say something positive to your spouse. I know there are times we get angry. But you can’t stay angry at someone who decides to be kind to you. So find something genuine about your spouse that you love and let them hear you say it to them daily. It’s work, but start doing it and see the immense benefits it would have on your family as a whole. Kind words are like medicine to the soul. James 1:19. Besides our kids are watching and making up their own conclusion on what marriage should look like.
4. Pray for your spouse: There is no better person that can take care of your spouse than God. Hand your spouse over to God daily. Pray for them, their goals, their dreams, their aspirations, their fears, their weaknesses, strengths and all. When you pray for your spouse consistently, you would see them become all you have prayed for before your eyes. This would make your heart full of gratitude and keep your bond strong. Pray for each other.
5. Be Spontaneous: Break the routine. Try new things together. Create new activities you can both enjoy or do something you have never done before together. In spending time together, you create memories and these memories always has a way of bringing you two closer.
6. Love your kids and give them attention, but don’t be so engulfed in loving your kids that you forget your spouse. It’s all about setting priorities and balance. A lot of us women are guilty of this. The moment we start having kids, we tend to put our husbands at the back sit. Kids are demanding, I know but in loving we should not allow anyone feel neglected. Remember one day our kids would grow and leave us all to face their own lives. If we ignore our spouses now, how would our relationship with them be when the house is empty and it’s just the two of you?
7. Communication is key: The power of communication in relationships can not be over emphasized. We must learn to talk and express our feelings in a very polite, pleasant and non confrontational way. Be open about your feelings, needs, wants, desires, dreams, fear, and all. Your spouse should be your friend.
8. Touch each other: Make it a point of duty to connect physically. Yes it’s important. A tap on the back, a hug, a cuddle, a kiss. All this gestures would begin to bring back your spark and revive that relationship. Do it with your heart and mean it. When this becomes a part of your lives, even you would see the glow you would be radiating.
There are more. But I would just stop here for now. Go ahead and implement these tips. If you have questions or contributions, drop them in the comment section. I would do my best to respond appropriately.
Until later, remember the time you put into your relationships would determine the quality of that relationship.
God bless you and always have a heart of gratitude.
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